Politics and growing up.

I've taken a mental side step and I'm now travelling in some parallel universe where everything is the same but it's all a bit hazy. A permanent psychosis, perhaps?

Without sounding immature, I think this is the start of growing up. I finding myself thinking about what kind of plates I would like in my dream home. I'm finding myself longing for a life partner. And on the other hand I'm finding myself back where I was, hating everything and lacking interest in moving forward. I didn't mean for that to sound like Julia Gillard.

On that topic, I think it is a true sign that Australian's are fed up with the choices we were given. As far as I can see the two governments competing for the top position are exactly the same except one is headed by a girl. If Julia Gillard wasn't a female, red head who doesn't believe in marriage, the Liberals would have won hands down. Their policies are exactly the same. False promises about things we won't be able to fix in the foreseeable future. I heard the topic of Australia become a republic came up this morning and I think, after the past week's mess we wouldn't be able to decide on a president that could fulfil the duty and please everyone. Admittedly no one can please all 21 million of us but some would try. The country would tall apart if when we went to the votes, we were choosing the country's ruler as opposed to someone to watch over us while the Queen is drinking tea.  We're like the eldest child, left to fend for ourselves. Instead we're stuck with two immature children who can't help but insult the other.

Move forward Australia? How about, grow up?

Learning

I like learning something about myself everyday. I like how I'm this mystical being that has hardly been discovered. Finding out why I do certain things or why I think certain things is therapeutic.

Baking

I like how cupcakes have this inherent innocence. "I'm so pretty, I'm a cupcake!"

but there could very well be a razor blade in it.

I drink Moccona from Scooby-Doo's head.

I appreciate cleanliness. I like how freshly vacuumed carpet feels under my feet. I love the smell of new things. The sound of newness being welcomed to the world when you open a DVD or the smell of a book recently purchased from the secondhand book store.

Smell makes up a big part of my life. Each person I know has a smell. Perhaps that sounds weird to those not in my brain. I would love to be Alice. The name, alone, has this persona attached to it, then you tack "in wonderland" on the end and all of the sudden there is this fictitious child who is as real as we are.

What ever we are...

Crazy.

People ask me how I am. We ask everyone how they are but we don't really want to hear all the details most of the time and we all settle for "Good." There's no problem with that, I just wish sometimes I could act on my initial response and fling shit at them.

I haven't got a job or a social network but we DO have a house now. Finally. Melbourne's weather is like a slap in the face... from an ice queen. So being back in Queensland for a week is nice, seeing the sun and all. He's not a regular visitor down in the big V.I.C.

I'm drinking coke and all I'm tasting is beer.

When I look back, it's all so alien to me. My past is somehow disconnected, as if it's someone elses and I'm just watching.

I need wine. TONIGHT! There shall be wine.